Monday, January 5, 2009

To go where like no man has gone before?


The Pink Tentacle Blog (and no, I have no idea why it's named that!) has an interesting report on a new-generation human waste disposal device for use in space.


The Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) has teamed up with engineers from the private sector to develop a next-generation space toilet, which they hope to complete within the next five years.

Clean and easy to use, the envisioned space toilet is designed to be worn like a diaper around the astronaut’s waist at all times. Sensors detect when the user relieves him or herself, automatically activating a rear-mounted suction unit that draws the waste away from the body through tubes into a separate container. In addition to washing and drying the wearer after each use, the next-generation space toilet will incorporate features that eliminate unwanted sound and odor.




The current ISS toilet is a Russian-built, western-style commode that sucks waste away like a vacuum cleaner. Use of that toilet requires practice before heading to space, particularly because an improperly seated user has the potential to create a messy situation.


Um . . . yes, I can see that an improvement over the current situation is greatly to be desired. However, I'm a bit concerned by the phrase 'suction unit'.

You see, back in World War II, there came a point in the development of fighter aircraft where their range was greatly extended. Pilots might have to sit in their cramped cockpits (you should pardon the expression) for several hours on end. Naturally, under such circumstances, they couldn't wait long enough to get back to the ground before relieving themselves.

The story is told that a suitable device was developed by a US fighter manufacturer. It consisted of a rubber funnel attached to a valve, leading to a hose, which led outside the aircraft. The idea was that the pilot would unbutton his flying suit, insert the appropriate organ into the funnel, open the valve, and relieve himself. The fast-moving air outside the fighter would exert sufficient suction to draw the urine down the tube and vent it into the slipstream . . . or so it was theoretically presumed.

Came the day of the first flight test of this new contraption. The test pilot, as instructed, climbed the fighter to well over 20,000 feet, then unbuttoned his clothing, positioned the funnel, inserted his organ, and pressed the button to open the valve in the pipe.

Listeners to his radio conversation heard: "JEEEEEE*** CHR*** . . . @#$% . . . " and sundry other naughty, non-professional pilot words. The fighter was observed on radar to make a flick-roll and dive straight down towards the earth at the highest possible speed, only pulling out of the dive at the last minute. The pilot headed back to the airfield, landed, and had to be physically restrained from assaulting the designers, who were waiting for his report.

It turned out that the air pressure differential, caused by the altitude and airspeed, had been rather greater than the designers had allowed for. Instead of merely directing the stream of urine down the pipe, the device had, in fact, sucked the pilot's essentials (all three of them) right into the pipe, down past the valve, and he couldn't get them out again! He'd had to dive to low altitude before the incredibly strong pull on them would ease off, and he was able to withdraw them.

Fortunately, despite being bruised and bloodshot, the organs in question recovered in due course . . . in all respects, it was reported.

One hopes the designers of this new device - and the astronauts testing it - will keep that lesson from history firmly in mind!



Peter

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was painful to read about.

Murphy said...

That had to suck...

Bob said...

And it was probably incredibly cold, too. *shivers*

Funny, funny story.

Crucis said...

When I was on flight ops in the AF some decades ago, we'd take along a thermos of coffee. An F4 doesn't have a lot of room. If our primary mission was scrubbed, we'd orbit, refuel, orbit waiting until we were needed. On occasion, this would take hours.

When ya gotta go, ya gotta go and the thermos was the only thing handy. We were always careful to choose an empty one and whomever used it personally washed it before turning it in for the next day.

Stories abound about what happened when someone didn't do their cleaning duties, but that's not for here.

Anonymous said...

The planes used by fish spotters for commercial fishing fleets down here on the Gulf often fly for ten or twelve hours at a time on external fuel tanks, making the pilot's bladder capacity an issue.

The solution was somewhat as you stated in the article, except the aircraft was usually a Piper or Cessna single engine plane with a top speed of around a hundred and twenty MPH, and the problem wasn't TOO MUCH suction, but rather not enough.

The aparatus had a funnel large enough for the business end of one's private part and the other end terminated into a venturi, a device that produced a slight vacuum from the air moving through it. Using one was not painful.

It was painful, though, to find out that one of your fellow pilots had corked your plane's hose and you didn't discover the fact until you had fluids already moving...

MC

Kevin said...

The Grumman OV-1D Mohawks have a similar setup to the one mentioned by Mostly Cajun, except no venturi. It relied on an angle cut on the end of the pipe exiting beneath the fuselage that faced aft, creating a slight suction.

Crew chiefs have been known to turn the pipe so that the opening of the pipe faced into the slipstream instead of away, allowing the tube to blow the contents back on the pilot or systems operator ( We each had one under our ejection seat.)

It pays to preflight everything, test the funnel for a slight suction before using, and keep an empty soda can in ones flight bag. Neatness when using went far to keep the crew chiefs on your good side and careless or sloppy use was a sure way to end up with a blower instead of a sucker some cold night mission.

Anonymous said...

That story made my day. I ruined my keyboard spraying it with coffee but it was worth it.

Fred